Boy Fast.

I have been on a boy fast for about four months. Why, you ask?

"Lindsey, are you giving up?"
No.
"Lindsey, are you switching sides?"
No.
"Is this Lindsey?"
Yes.

My reasons are as follows:

• I base too much of my self esteem on boys
• I think too much about them
• They are dumb most of the time
• If you are not happy with yourself single, you won't be happy with yourself married
• I seem to think that "Oh just hung out with my family and watched movies" comes second to everyone else's reports of what they did the night before - "Oh Jonny called me and then Bernie took me out to ice cream and can you believe that Stu brought me chocolates, and then I made out with Mickey."

SOOOOoooo.... logically, if I stop thinking about boys all the time and caring what they think about me or say, then I will be able to focus on being the best Lindsey I can be and preparing for going through the Temple in September! WOOT! What's wrong with hanging out with family? What's wrong with watching movies and having a quiet night in with absolutely no drama?

"Is this Lindsey?"
Yes! Stop asking! I'm still me!

My rules were as follows:

• Do not text or call a boy without a reason.
• Do not think about boys. Get them OUT OF YOUR HEAD.
  
• Do not be aggressive. If they ask you out, go, and have a good time. They can date you if they want. You are not going to be the pursuer.
  
• Find the good in having self-time and not having to decide between a million boys at once.
• Be excited to tell people that you hung out with girls, your sister, your parents, whatever. You have fun with them. So, why not start acting like it?
• Learn to love yourself.
  
• Work on your relationship with God.

OKAY, SO................
That should have done the trick, right? Sure. I have improved so much. I can really see the difference.

BUTT (yes, two t's, because that's what boys can be)
TWO boys are RUINING MY FAST! We shall refer to them as DDS and Blanch. Most of you should know who I mean. DDS sat with me in church again and wrote me a note, asking to write a poem with him to pass the time. He wrote the first line, I wrote the next, etc. This is what we came up with on the spot:
DDS: There once was a gypsy named Ari,
L: She danced like flames, but her legs were hairy.
DDS: Her dance made men hot, while her legs were just not,
L: Quasimodo just screamed, "Sanctuary!"

L: Said the farmer to his wife one day...
DDS: Maybelline, make me a feast! Don't delay!
L: In spite she snapped back, "You must be on crack!"

DDS: Choose your own ending:
And now that poor farmer is gay
Then shoot me up, and I'll be on my way!
So don't by (his spelling error, not mine) your wife on e-bay!

I chose the gay one. With good reason.

It was pretty tough to keep him out of my mind the rest of the day. I know nothing will EVER happen, but he just makes me smile and he is just gorgeous.

BLANCH, on the other hand, is making me mad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He still is not leaving me alone, even though he is pretty much dating this 19-year old. So then, he throws a bomb at me.

"Have you seen my sketches of you?"

no, Blanch. NO.
I look 60 years old in the bottom left two. I look 14 in the top one, but he said he was trying to picture us in the 80s, in grade school. I have a Hello Kitty purse. HELLO? KITTY?

Why are you drawing me?!

L: The big ring is perfect! I love big rings!
Blanch: I've noticed.

Go ..... draw a hole and climb in it, Blanch!

Okay, and to add to everything else, we have this lovely clip that HBeck sent me today. This is enough to send me into an ETERNAL boy fast.

I added the Dwight Bobblehead image because blogger only lets you upload videos and pictures, not mp3s. So, I made a movie. Yes, I am my father's daughter. Enjoy.