HBeck and I tried to come up with fantastically awful* pickup lines today. Try using these on your next attempt at picking up a date from a complete stranger. Let me know the results.
- Hey, is your daddy a magician? Because he'll have to make my broken heart disappear if you don't agree to go out with me.
- is your daddy a baker? cause i'm hungry and i like bread so we should go out
- is your dad a plastic surgeon? because you look a lot better than you did in high school and now i will go out with you
- Boy, are you allergic to colors? Because white is the absence of color, and if you get with me, we can get married, and I will wear a white wedding dress to help alleviate your allergies.
- Hey, are you published? Because I can read you like an open book and I know you are into me like i'm into you.
- is your daddy on welfare? because i like free stuff. so you should buy me dinner.
- Oh Say, can you see? Because I've got my sights set on you.
- Do you play soccer? Because you're the goalie of my attention. (That one is deep)
- Do you have money? Wanna go out?
- Did you just fart? because I've never been so blown away. (resorting to being 13 again)
- are you a model? cause you're hot
- do you like ice cream? cause i do and you should buy me some and then we will kiss
- Do you like oranges? Because your face looks like it has been Sunkist and i want to kiss it too
- do you work in a hospital? because i'm about to pull the plug on my life if you don't go out with me this friday
- Do you sell organ insurance? because i'm pretty sure you're stealing my heart.
- Do you work for Southwest? Because I have tons of emotional baggage and I really wouldn't want to pay an additional fee to go out with you.
4 comments:
you two rock!
Ok, so, You don't know me... but I love your blog! Uh... ignore the creeptacularity for a moment, I swear I'm not strange... well.. anyway. What I REALLY wanted to say was that I couldn't stop laughing as I read your blog. I don't even remember how I came across it or why... but you're hilarious. Please don't be freaked out.
Well, I guess it must be fate that I found your blog then. :) I think I was just blog hopping- reading random blogs linked to my friends' blogs and so on and so forth... anywho, rest assured that I'm not a weirdo... in the general sense of the word at least. I'm just ultra-paranoid because I've never randomly commented on a random person's blog... :S K, I'm done justifying.
You are hilarious and so are your pick up lines. I will write them down and keep them with me always so I can put them to use.
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